As I am writing this, I am neglecting my own advice. *which is why I would love for you to learn from my self-neglect
This post is about listening to your needs and reacting to them as a priority, and here I am writing while my body is shivering.
Give me a moment as I get myself a jumper, a hot water bottle and a cup of tea.
Do you ever feel like you are putting yourself on hold for something or someone else? That you are completely neglecting your needs and what your body is telling you?
I often come home and go straight to my computer to “quickly check something”‘, and end up sitting there for ages with my dress half off, my tights hanging down one leg, and the strap of my bag still draped around my shoulders.
You might also find me chatting with someone online, and instead of excusing myself for a minute, I will hobble on my chair holding back my need to go to the toilet until I can’t hold it any longer [after which you will see me do the “camel walk” to the bathroom because there is no other way to make it without leakage…].
Those are not only embarrassing, but also sad moments of obvious self-neglect. And, they are more damaging than you might think.
Sometimes its not stopping to eat even though your body is telling you it has had enough. Sometimes it’s not taking time for yourself [even after you’ve been tending to everyone else.] Sometimes it’s rescheduling your entire week around someone else’s, because you value their time more than yours.
Standing alone, these little instances might not seem like much, but if done consitently and over a longer period of time, they will produce unhappiness and self-sabotaging habits.
You will no longer listen to your bodies signals and needs, and be so disconnected that you feel out of control when it comes to exercise and nutrition. You will be so emotionally and physically exhausted that you will be unable to care for yourself [or anyone else]. provide anyone with any help or , and not only will you be unable to take care of anyone else, you will
My body is cold, hungry, and in need of grooming, but instead of honouring that and taking care of myself, I put everything and everyone else first. I would rather spend twenty minutes freezing , than just stop what I am doing and get something to warm myself up.
I literally procrastinate on taking care of myself
Do you ever feel like this is something that just “happens” to you too?
Today I decided to actively notice this behaviour and think of new ways to take care of my wellbeing.
Here are a few bullet points on ways that I will try to take better care of myself:
I will honour my needs by listening to them.
When I feel cold, hunger, unease, exhaustion or any other sign my body is sending me, I will acknowledge it and react on it.
I will give myself the space to “arrive” first.
I create the time to come home and spend the first 15 minutes on myself.
I will do my best to always create the most comfortable and pleasing environment for myself BEFORE I start doing something.
I make myself a priority and communicate honestly to others, if I want/need to take some time to tend to my needs.
I do not multitask, but finish one thing at a time. (I can’t even count how many cups of tea I made that I forgot about)
I just go to the toilet when I need to.
I will get a jumper when I am cold.
I will take the time to light a candle and burn some incense to ground myself.
I will take the time to be present and sink into myself.
I will make the time to wash my body, brush my teeth, moisturise my body and brush my hair regularly.
I will nurture my body with food that makes me feel good on the inside and look good on the outside. I will anticipate my hunger so that I make better food choices.
I will enjoy the feel of soft clothing
Some of these things are so simple and common-sense that it is embarrassing to even mention them – but there are days when self-love is about that most basic level of care.
What would you add to the list? What do you do to take care of yourself on the most basic level?
The Good Enough Creative
A lot of us have internalised beliefs that keep us miserable + secretly thinking that our emotional suffering is a necessary [and even romantic] part of the creative process.
It took me too long to realise how wrong this is, and it's why I've created this video series for you:
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